What a bio Mother or Father has with their child is a bond of history more than anything else.
"Remember when this happened or we did that?" I often used to hear my skids say to my DH. I used to cringe becasue it was before me and involved BM.
But you know what took away that sinking feeling in my gut? Time.
Time that built history.
What makes any relationship or friendship is stuff you go through together. Peaks and valleys; the whole kit and kaboodle. Some memories will make you laugh and some will make you cry.
So if I could give any CSM advice, I would tell her that time not only heals all wounds, it builds history. YOUR history with them.
So now I hear "remember that time we..." to me. I even have pictures to prove it!
I love it! I used to (in my mind) roll my eyes at times when my BF's kids brought up "remember when Mommy this", "remember when mommy that", and then I'd feel guilty for feeling this way. I'm glad to hear that it can get better.
ReplyDeleteIt does, I assure you. :-)
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